I would like to say that I have not written on my blog lately just because of busy-ness. But if I was to be honest I would say it is really because I keep thinking there is going to be some cute joke or saying or story that is lighthearted which I can share with you. I do not want people to be sad when they read the words each time they log in.
I HAVE laughed and I have been having fun, but nothing funny to me lately seems significant enough (or appropriate - ha!) to post. So until God sends to me something I think is lighthearted and feel a need to share, you will have to read the sappy stuff.
I have had plenty of very emotional thoughts, read so many great stories, quotes, poems and the like. God is truly speaking to me daily in all that I do.
The holidays are here and all the shopping, parties, giftwrapping, etc. have begun. To some it may be just another year to "get it all done," spend some extra time with family, go to that candlelight service and such. Yes, many of you who read this blog will not forget the "Christ" in Christmas or the reason for the season. I approached the holidays as I always do until something hit me squarely between the eyes last week: this could be my last holiday season on Earth. (I warned you it would be sappy!) cry...cry...
I have always heard so many people who have lost loved ones say, "This is our first Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, etc. without so and so." Boy that really holds meaning for me now! Here I am wanting and begging God to let me have many more holiday seasons with my family by giving me a new liver. The problem: that means I am also praying for someone else to not have any more Christmas' with their family. I have got to wrap my arms around this concept and believe God has a true purpose for this illness and all that comes with it!
In the meantime, I am going to enjoy my family and friends and praise God for the wonderful life I have had SO FAR.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
continued prayer
All day long God has been bringing the word "prayer" to me - from different readings and people. So many of you have been sending me words of encouragement, poems, prayers, etc. I love all of them and each one speaks to me and gives me hope. Today a friend sent this prayer that touched my heart:
"Please Lord heal this servant and allow her to be here on earth to raise her children and be a helpmate to her husband and a wise counselor to her family and friends, we pray this in Jesus mighty and powerful name - Amen!"
I had to take Payne to the doctor a couple of weeks ago. He just hates going to the doctor. He is afraid of shots. We had to sit in the examination for 1 hour which only got him more stirred up. He then started chanting something silently. After a couple of minutes, I understood him to be saying "Please don't make me take a shot."
Then...he saw the doctor in the hallway going into another room, so he put his hands together in prayer asking God not to let the doctor give him a shot. I could not resist and took a picture...
"Please Lord heal this servant and allow her to be here on earth to raise her children and be a helpmate to her husband and a wise counselor to her family and friends, we pray this in Jesus mighty and powerful name - Amen!"
I had to take Payne to the doctor a couple of weeks ago. He just hates going to the doctor. He is afraid of shots. We had to sit in the examination for 1 hour which only got him more stirred up. He then started chanting something silently. After a couple of minutes, I understood him to be saying "Please don't make me take a shot." Then...he saw the doctor in the hallway going into another room, so he put his hands together in prayer asking God not to let the doctor give him a shot. I could not resist and took a picture...
It was hard for me to ask for a miracle because I thought it was self-centered. But that is how God teaches us to pray: like children. Our children come to us and ask us for crazy-over the top requests (that usually only benefit themselves), but we would be upset if they did not come to us and ask us for anything.
I believe I am here today because I know that my prayer warriors - just like persistent children asking their father - have gotten me to where I am today and I ask that you continue to do so.
3 weeks turns into 2 months
Two months ago today I was told I had 3 weeks to live. I will keep praising God on all of these anniversaries. I have to hope and pray there will be more - because I still think there is a purpose for me to have a pulse - a plan that I still need to be on this earth in which to finish.
Thank you to all of you, my prayer warriors! God is working a miracle! I feel it is because of this army that I believe, and have hope, this miracle will occur.
Me Ke Aloha Pumehana, Dawn
Thank you to all of you, my prayer warriors! God is working a miracle! I feel it is because of this army that I believe, and have hope, this miracle will occur.
Me Ke Aloha Pumehana, Dawn
Monday, November 16, 2009
another medical visit...with a story...
Many people have said I will have so many stories from this experience...
At the phlebotomist's (I just had to use that big word to sound knowledgable - it is the word for the person who takes your blood but sure sounds like a big deal doctor, doesn't it?) office today:
I got on the elevator with a man who fell asleep standing up. He looked like he had a tough night. The bell that announces we are at our floor scared him out of his sleep and he yelped. Did I forget to tell you we were only on the 6th floor?
He got off the elevator ahead of me and went straight to the bathroom. I went to the office, checked in, and sat in the waiting room.
Guess who walked in?
Sure enough: my tired elevator partner with his newly created specimen in hand. Maybe I am being negative but I am pretty sure he may fail the urine test.
At the phlebotomist's (I just had to use that big word to sound knowledgable - it is the word for the person who takes your blood but sure sounds like a big deal doctor, doesn't it?) office today:
I got on the elevator with a man who fell asleep standing up. He looked like he had a tough night. The bell that announces we are at our floor scared him out of his sleep and he yelped. Did I forget to tell you we were only on the 6th floor?
He got off the elevator ahead of me and went straight to the bathroom. I went to the office, checked in, and sat in the waiting room.
Guess who walked in?
Sure enough: my tired elevator partner with his newly created specimen in hand. Maybe I am being negative but I am pretty sure he may fail the urine test.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
puts it all in perspective...
This a continuation from my last post. I will continue to remember this cute greeting card a friend sent me.
Inside it says "A bad day is all about perspective."
This really has been a good week. I got to go to a play at the Alley Theater and Thursday we went to a special performance hosted by the Fort Bend Arts Council. Last night I got to go see the winning SBS Eagles football team win their playoff game. I got to see so many people i had not seen in a while and everyone was so encouraging.
There were a couple of days there that I was really tired and then starting imagining things (yellow eyes getting worse, etc.). Those were the days that were really out of my control. I just need to keep praying for a miracle.
Then there were days where days and incidences happened that were OUT of my control. At the end of the day, the lady at Verizon is not going be nice and help me, the substitute teacher at school will continue to be a little rough, and a good friend, whom I had hoped would be friends for years to come, will just not like you anymore because of a misunderstanding.
In most cases people just are not going to change. I cannot change them. Instead, I can just pray for those people who I do not know personally. I have no idea if bad situations have befallen them recently.
In the case of the friend - this was the hardest of all this week and caused me to lose some sleep - all I can do is pray our friendship can be restored.
In all honesty: this is probably not how I would have handled it all before my illness - anybody want to speak up to that? (OK - don't get me wrong I will admit something now: maybe I was not so nice to both ladies lack of help and attitude - but since then I have prayed for them and I have prayed for myself and my response - at least I am progressing.)
God is teaching me to be patient - I am a patient with patience, I hope.
There were a couple of days there that I was really tired and then starting imagining things (yellow eyes getting worse, etc.). Those were the days that were really out of my control. I just need to keep praying for a miracle.
Then there were days where days and incidences happened that were OUT of my control. At the end of the day, the lady at Verizon is not going be nice and help me, the substitute teacher at school will continue to be a little rough, and a good friend, whom I had hoped would be friends for years to come, will just not like you anymore because of a misunderstanding.
In most cases people just are not going to change. I cannot change them. Instead, I can just pray for those people who I do not know personally. I have no idea if bad situations have befallen them recently.
In the case of the friend - this was the hardest of all this week and caused me to lose some sleep - all I can do is pray our friendship can be restored.
In all honesty: this is probably not how I would have handled it all before my illness - anybody want to speak up to that? (OK - don't get me wrong I will admit something now: maybe I was not so nice to both ladies lack of help and attitude - but since then I have prayed for them and I have prayed for myself and my response - at least I am progressing.)
God is teaching me to be patient - I am a patient with patience, I hope.
I am also going to remember this daily in these circumstances
Monday, November 9, 2009
why?
Do you ever have one of those days that start out perfectly and then something beyond your control just ruins them?
This has now happened 2 days in a row now.
Why? The devil?
I cannot help but think that this is not good for my health.
This has now happened 2 days in a row now.
Why? The devil?
I cannot help but think that this is not good for my health.
where are my delivery phone numbers?
It is a good thing I went to the ranch for rejuvenation. Tonight I start doing our family meals again. Am I ready for this - or better yet are my boys? Ha! Now if I could only find those illusive pots and pans...
Things I Should say...
What a great few days for my health - mentally and physically.
On the spur of the moment Thursday, Clay said I could take off to the ranch alone. That is the first time I have been REALLY alone since going into the hospital. All I did was read and rest. Clay even survived getting a phone call from the school nurse! It helped my spirits in that I know things CAN be taken care of by others and I do not have to be superwoman.
It really boosted my energy (I went to Sunday school and church yesterday - it was great to be back)!
And it really gave me some alone time to reflect on some things and to clear my head.I have so many thank you's (that need just the right words) for so many people it has been overwhelming. Reflecting about words you want to say to others reminded me of a song someone recently sent me:
http://www.sidewalkprophets.com/ecard/?psid=google
Things should be said before it takes a crisis. But if there is a crisis, make sure there is nothing left unsaid.
On the spur of the moment Thursday, Clay said I could take off to the ranch alone. That is the first time I have been REALLY alone since going into the hospital. All I did was read and rest. Clay even survived getting a phone call from the school nurse! It helped my spirits in that I know things CAN be taken care of by others and I do not have to be superwoman.
It really boosted my energy (I went to Sunday school and church yesterday - it was great to be back)!
And it really gave me some alone time to reflect on some things and to clear my head.I have so many thank you's (that need just the right words) for so many people it has been overwhelming. Reflecting about words you want to say to others reminded me of a song someone recently sent me:
http://www.sidewalkprophets.com/ecard/?psid=google
Things should be said before it takes a crisis. But if there is a crisis, make sure there is nothing left unsaid.
Monday, November 2, 2009
doctor's appointment
The doctors says I am good! Yippee!
Thank you for all of your prayers!
I do have to make some changes to medication and still have to watch the following:
1) Keep away from the flu and all sicknesses
2) Get plenty of sleep
3) Remain stress-free
4) Keep giving blood every other other week so they can continue testing
5) Watch my diet
etc.
In other words, keep doing what I have been doing because it is working. The following was stressed to me: Just because of a good report, don't put your life back in overdrive! You are still a very sick woman who needs to treat herself as such.
Thank you for all of your prayers!
I do have to make some changes to medication and still have to watch the following:
1) Keep away from the flu and all sicknesses
2) Get plenty of sleep
3) Remain stress-free
4) Keep giving blood every other other week so they can continue testing
5) Watch my diet
etc.
In other words, keep doing what I have been doing because it is working. The following was stressed to me: Just because of a good report, don't put your life back in overdrive! You are still a very sick woman who needs to treat herself as such.
the waiting room - woops (think an unedited one went through)
I wish I could actually send you this post immediately but I have not figured out how to post from my blackberry yet.
So here is what I wrote as I sat in the doctor's waiting room:
Jared read our daily devotional today. It sure hit home.
It was about Bethany Hamilton, the 13 year old surfer who was on her way to surfing stardom before her arm was bitten off by a shark.
This is what the devotional said:
"After the shark took her arm, her spirits didn't dampen. In fact, she told one of her friends that she was this happened to her because then she could tell the whole world about God.Even without her arm, Hamilton knows her future is bright - whether its in surfing, photography, or whatever else she wants to do. With God as her Savior, Bethany's not worried. She even competed again ten weeks after the accident. As followers of Jesus Christ, we shouldn't fret about what's going to happen to us, either. No matter what happens - good or bad - God can use it for our benefit."
Here we go...
So here is what I wrote as I sat in the doctor's waiting room:
Jared read our daily devotional today. It sure hit home.
It was about Bethany Hamilton, the 13 year old surfer who was on her way to surfing stardom before her arm was bitten off by a shark.
This is what the devotional said:
"After the shark took her arm, her spirits didn't dampen. In fact, she told one of her friends that she was this happened to her because then she could tell the whole world about God.Even without her arm, Hamilton knows her future is bright - whether its in surfing, photography, or whatever else she wants to do. With God as her Savior, Bethany's not worried. She even competed again ten weeks after the accident. As followers of Jesus Christ, we shouldn't fret about what's going to happen to us, either. No matter what happens - good or bad - God can use it for our benefit."
Here we go...
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